Affirm Someone Today
I’ve gotten a lot of response from blog posts that are about affirmation.
I’m a big fan of affirmation. Maybe it’s because I crave people’s approval. This is not something I’m proud of, and I’m working on it. Have had a lot of progress, too, by the way. So you can pat me on the back for that.
Hehe. Just kidding.
Ok, anyway, either way – affirmation is a good thing. True, real, rightful, justified affirmation I mean. Like when you give your kid props for something she did well. Something specific. “Thanks for taking the garbage out the first time I asked you, kid! That was awesome.” Or when you thank your spouse for the help cleaning up the dishes after dinner. “Hey, I appreciate you filling up the dishwasher while I explained to our children that they cannot under any circumstances tie Edwin to the bed.” You know, stuff like that.
Sometimes Satan tells me I shouldn’t have to thank people for things they “should” do anyway. But that is false. It sounds kindof good sometimes. Especially when pride is in the driver’s seat. But it is untrue. Publicly declaring appreciation for the positive behavior of someone in our lives is a good thing.
In fact, I think there should be more of it. I know in my own household there isn’t enough. I am really good at tearing my kids down and listing off the things they haven’t done or shouldn’t have done. The list of complaints about my husband that I carry around in the back of my head, ready at a moment’s notice (shut-it, you have one too), is really not helpful to anyone except The Accuser. And it seems like every time I have a praise, I have a caveat to go with it so that everyone knows things could always be better. “We had a great time last night! I mean, except our waiter was useless. But other than that, dinner was a treat!”
In an effort to promote ‘goodness’ in my life and for others, I’m going to spend more time on Home Building talking about ways we can affirm each other. Ways we can build each other up. I’d like to think that I have written a lot about this, but now I’m going to make a conscious effort.
I’d like to declare my support for, uphold and defend my friends, my family, and – guess who else? – myself. Crazy ideas, I know. Not at all in line with the guilt and frustration that we like to carry around with us. Too bad. Get out of the way, lies and invalidation. In fact, I’m not only going to speak positive truths about those people, but if I have an opportunity I’d like to support people I don’t know too. You know, like with a polite smile, or patience at the store. I’d like to be forgiving and encouraging if the opportunity presents itself. Maybe I’ll even create some opportunities for it.
Join me in working towards more support and encouragement. I know you can do it. 😉